Appendix C- Example of Similarity

Appendix C

Example of Similarity

I have so many examples of how similarity has influenced my friendships that I don’t have the time or space to list them all. Though, I will use examples from two of my friendships to demonstrate; the first friend is a very close friend of mine and we have been friends for over 10 years and the second friend I consider a friend, but not a close friend and we have known each other for 15 years.

Hopefully, when comparing the two you can see why I would be more likely to be close friends with the person in friendship one, who I am very similar to, then I would be with the person in friendship two, who I am quite different to.

Friendship One:
Similarities
1. We attended the same school, had the same subjects, obtained similar UAI’s and now we do the same degree
2. We are both females and we were born a month apart (same star sign too)
3. Both of similar height and not much difference in weight
4. We come from similar socioeconomic backgrounds and live 15 minutes away from each other
5. We like the same music, clothes ,movies etc. and we are attracted to similar people and share many friends
6. Both of us are Catholic and were raised by strict parents
7. I would say we have very similar beliefs and values
8. We talk in a similar way, do our hair the same and frequently come up with the same ideas
9. Both of us are non-smokers, who still live at home and we both come from big families

Differences
1. I like playing sport, exercising and been active, whereas she is a bit of a couch potato
2. I am good with my money and saving, she is hopeless and constantly broke
3. I have a fulltime job, she works whenever she feels like it
4. I like children and she can’t stand them

Friendship Two:
Similarities
1. Attended the same primary school
2. We are both female and both Catholic
3. Both work fulltime time
4. Both like sport and exercising
Differences
1. She dropped out of school in year 10 and doesn’t believe in uni (or an education for that matter)
2. She is two years older
3. We come from different socioeconomic backgrounds and we raised very differently (she was raised in a single parent family and she was the only child)
4. She now lives out of home, in Sydney
5. In terms of looks she would be significantly bigger than me (not that that actually bothers me, consciously)
6. She smokes and drinks excessively
7. Terrible with money and holding down a job for more than a month
8. I would guess that we have very different beliefs and values and we probably want different things out of life.
9. We have very different tastes regarding EVERYTHING and because of this we constantly argue

I could be here forever talking about our differences just as I could be here forever talking about how similar my close friend and I are. Though, while I consider them both friends, I have found that the differences I have with the second friend have stopped us from developing a close committed relationship like the one I have with the first friend I described. This is just one everyday example of how similarity can influence whether or not we form a close bond with another person.